Scarred Petals..

So what's beauty without life?
Stale memories void of joy,
Just what's that feeling of emptiness?
That hole in our hearts that doesn't cease to deepen?

We don't say goodbye to tattooed memories,
To love unending,
To  a life well lived,
To an angel stuck in between.

The beauty of being human is that we all hurt,
So I'm here trying to fit in the black patterns,
Soothing snorts to hide the pain,
A perfect mass of dumb hurt.

Ma,
Unbreak my heart, uncry my tears,
Make this pain cease and the hurt halt,
If I had a wish,
I'd give you a thousand lives,
A perfect dose of happiness
And all the health in the world.
But I'll give you roses,
Because that's all you can take now.

They say you don't know what you've got till it's gone,
Sure lacking has made me understand what it meant to have,
So as I watch the rain drip on your grave,
I believe memories don't fade,
And love, love is a gift you so much gave.

Till we meet again,
I believe there's more to all this,
Than just the scattered scarred petals.


For Alphonsina. RIP.
#chroniclesofadeadpoet

Perfect Love..

Hold up..this isn't about the crazy overrated fairytales of perfectly manicured princesses and proper gentlemen. No, this isn't about chocolate and flowers or of girls who can cook, clean and still do you good. Nop this is about love.

For months I wore make up and paid extra attention to how I walk and dress with hope that Mr.  Right would bump into me.  Obviously I didn't want to ruin the first expression moment.  Well, as life turns out to be awfully unfair I met him all rained on, shivering like a lost duckling,  sticky clothes and miserable ( it was totally awful) hair. Trust me it didn't end there.

Anyways just what is perfect love? Love without flaws without blemish. You know the kind of Boris and Nicole kinda couple. Ladies, snap out of this! For goodness sake those Mexican soap operas are just hopeless plots! Trust me if you're waiting on your poor man to buy you flowers, serenade you every five minutes, remember just how you like your coffee blah blah blah sister Jesus is coming soon, He's the man for you!
Okay, I'm not saying that you should accept a sissy as a man. No. Just let your man be a man. Honey, there's no perfect love. Love is the perfect weaving of two imperfect people who perfectly know each other's flawlessness and still see them as perfectly beautiful 😊  You can read that again ma'am.

You see, at the start of many relationships we tend to be blinded by so many things that we actually assume our partner's shortcomings. As the relationship grows deeper the flaws becomes all over sudden magnified. Like thoroughly zoomed out. Now here's where the real test of love sets in. Sweetie he was all funny and cute till you realise he actually has smelly feet you can't just assume anymore. Or hey she was this sex goddess and now she can't even wash her own face.

Then it reaches a point where you get to realise whether you were in love, obsessed, infatuated or plainly lustful. They all kinda wear off. And when you truly love someone you just don't dash out the door because suddenly you realised they ain't as good as you thought they were. You embrace them..darling I'm not saying you go suck those smelly toes..ahah I'd rather die😉  what I mean is you help that person get over it. Like hey hun why not get home remedies for smelly feet. Change your sock brand. Something like that.

I'd like to sugar coat this but perfect love does NOT exist. Oh please we all know unless he's in diapers; you can't change a man. But who wants a change man when we can just create a better version of him??? So dear sisters quit looking for the perfect guy! ( Unless it's the movie of course!) Before you let anyone love you, love yourself. Only then will you realise how much of a kinky bi*** you are to handle. It's 10 times worse for your man.

Don't forget, love is imperfect, full of flaws. We all know a happy woman is either bisexual or cheating. We'll whine and do all that because we love you! Look into your partner's eyes and forget the damn smelly feet for Christ's sake! It's your life..your relationship..your man. Make him YOURS!

As my nigga John legend sung ' love your curves and all your edges, all your perfect imperfections '

So sweethearts just as he ain't perfect, you ain't too. Sit down and love that gracious mess that's your man. It's worth every bit.😊

Between our love..

Tell me love,
Between you and I,
Between these two racing hearts,
Between the long stares and tattooed memories,
What lies between our love?

We cried and laughed,a little giggle in between,
We fought and made up,
We scream yet whisper love quotes,
But in between,lies just us,
Between our love,
There's you and I.

When the world stops spinning,
And hearts stop beating,
When I can't touch you anymore,
And you can't feel the joy in my laughter,
Don't ever forget one thing,
Between our love,
We lay still.

Untouched,unreachable even dead,
I'll try to remember your smile,
And hope you'll do mine,
Because between our love,
I feel nothing,
I see nothing,
I am nothing.

Between our love is there hope for a future?
Do you trust me enough to let me see,
Is there truth?
I want to know beyond us,
What lies between us,
Between our love,
Is there love?

For my Mulaimu.
#chroniclesofadeadpoet.

Red dotted pain.

While the pastor promised of all my scarlets kinda bleached to white,
You constantly turn my sheets deathly red,
Well all that's crimson ain't a sin,
But with you I can murder to halt the pain.

If I could erase your memory,
I'd make you skip the monthly scare,
And totally forget you were here,
And if only you were human,
I'd let the devil take your breathe away.

One plus one may equal two,
But with you around we'll just remain as odd,
As I toss and turn all night,
Curse and bless you I just might,
As they say; the beauty of a butterfly,
Is in it's freedom.

I try to embrace the beauty in you Red dotted pain,
The edge in my womanhood terrain.

 

Loner Diaries.

The patterns  on the sand,
May have been blown away.
The photos in twos,
All choked up in flames.
But tell me,
How do I make these emotions fade too?

Once upon a time,
There was you and I,
But the letters in between got their better share,
 I stagger home all alone,
Holding on to the bitter sweet memories,
Of a different tale when you were here.
All shadows tow in twos,
While mine reluctantly thrives in solitude,
The echoes still fresh in my mind,
Same voice,same girl,
I hope tomorrow brings less sorrow.

My Cinderella ran away,
I was not sober enough to do the chase thing,
But I do hope his cuddle keeps you as warm,
I closed my eyes to the unfortunate vision,
And held on to the glass slipper,
Hoping one day you'll need this shoe,
That once more I'll have you to me.

What's felt and what's seen are unparalleled emotions,
Things were perfect yesterday,
But they all lace the nightmare I have to live today.

I hope God made another to love me,
And I hope it won't hurt too.

the long texts ,IMs, emails.
 The dates, long night sexy calls....
 Flirty hours ,
 amazing smiles...
 they say new love is strong,
 but will It last for long???
 I have no idea love depreciates..
 or how we just lose it..
 things that used to matter, don't matter no more.
 sweetheart ,honey, darling..
 no longer appropriate ..
 more fights..
 lots of make up sex..
 but we both know. we're losing it. ..
 late night texts
 late night drinking sprees..
 Flirty hours,
 cheating spouses.
 holding On to the past when the present doesn't exist..
 the future a mirage!
 love turn sour...
 amazing smiles,
 teary lonely nights...
 betrayed trust.
 lost love.
 should we walk away?
 should we give it one last shot?
 can we learn to love again????

No honey, not tonight.

I saw the texts alright,
And the lipstick stains on your shirt,
The deceiving scent of another woman,
Not forgetting the lodging receipt,
The smirk on your face expecting a cuddle?
No honey, not tonight.

I have a whole lot on my desk,
The project's due tomorrow noon,
My boss needs this report ASAP,
Baby, you know I have to put food on the table,
You have to understand,
No honey, not tonight.

It's that time of the month,
I feel crappy inside out,
Don't touch me,
Don't kiss me,
Don't even think about it.
No honey, not tonight.

I have my finals in a week,
You know how bad I need this,
Love, I'll make it up to you the week after,
It's for our future,
No honey, not tonight.

No honey,
You are going to turn right back,
Because tonight is my night,
Halt all your excuses please,
And get my conjugal rights RIGHT!