Keeping that relationship real...

Keeping it 100%


In darkness we yearn for light. Unknowing that maybe the stars might lead our way. It's basic human nature. We barely know when we are wanted. Take for instance love, marriage and dating. We always think it's greener and better on the other side. It takes pain to remind us not all that glitters is gold.
Love is a beautiful thing..ain't opposing that. But is it really love if it ain't true? Is it love if it can't withstand honesty? I believe the very fundamental asset of a relationship is it's ability to root the association in trust.
Trust doesn't mean just the basic " I trust you" line. It's about total acceptance and acceptance of your mate's being. It's not just liking the outside but totally falling in love with the inside. Knowing their weakness yet trusting them enough to handle your own. I do believe trust is love. Without trust it's mediocre acquitting.
The other very important thing is respect. Just for the record respect is a two way thing.    Both parties should be familiar with their partner's weaknesses, their boundaries and comfort zones. Respect is knowing this will or won't make her happy. Knowing to bae Friday nights are movie nights so probably I should reschedule the girls night out.  If one doesn't respect the other in a relationship it brings about the feelings of depression, self pity and in extreme situations low self esteem.it is mandatory to respect each other in a relationship and knowing just how far is too far.
Finally it's all about love. Seriously why would you be in a relationship to start with? Love is caring, devoting oneself to another, tender and so on. If a person is in a relationship that doesn't entail love probably it won't last. Love is patient, love is kind. It forgives easily and is slow to anger. Love cares.love bothers. Love insists. Love is the most beautiful thing. Love doesn't hurt. And when a person loves, it's best when they get it right back.

half of whole..

Half a soul.


Half the times we know what's right but opt for the wrong..
Half the times we live through other's eyes and neglect our own..
Half the times we'd rather have it all than share the throne..
Half the times we criticize more than we compliment..
Half the times we tend to lie than face the truth..
Just wondering why live half a soul when God made us whole?

 

My grandmother's Christmas story...

SIKUKUU
(My grandma's story )

The only time of the year we'd eat chapati, rice and meat all at once,
A festive season it was, worth the name ,
Just after the "ebisimba ",the circumcised boys were set free to be men.
They graced their manhood with vigorous dances at the marketplace, adorned with ornaments.

Well it was that time of the year,
When my father would walk in from the white man's house,
Dangling some goodies..
We would all run to him,
Chanting "thatha Ochire beka ethwani nse "
Father is home, slaughter a cock.

Amazing beautiful time it was,
On the specific sacred bright Morning,
We would all go down to the river and have the scrub of our lives,
Get back home and smear some milking jelly,
Shine like a thoroughly cleaned sufuria!
We would then all excitedly put on our new clothes,
"Nguo ya sikukuu "
They would range from the well tailored "amasungora "cotton clothes, to the "amachabani "that's for the lucky ones,
Ready made clothes from Japan,
If it was too bad, hand-me-downs we would proudly wear,
Like Who cared? It was Christmas!

Our mothers would get their cornrows neatly done and align us all to church,
Where the village pastor would boom about a God,
A Messiah born on that day,
We would religiously chant hyms
While our minds wandered to our grandmother's hut
Where goodies especially the chapatis, rice and "mandas "
Were being prepared by the special experienced village cook.

After church,
We would all gather and have a proper fulfilling meal,
The women danced,
The men enjoyed their busaa,
There was plenty of milk, water and busaa to go around,
laughter sparkled,
Many goats and chicken were mercilessly brought to death,
Lots of chapatis,
Not forgetting new clothes for everyone!
The Messiah was born!

It was "siku ya furaha "happy day,
The much awaited SIKUKUU,
I remember the joy and homely feeling just like it was yesterday,
Well it's been 60 years,
Some of my grandchildren went to Mombasa forget Christmas,
My children only M-pesa me,
Some will call to wish me a merry Christmas,
They will send images on this thing called whatsapp that my granddaughter has!
Ah! Technology.. after all what is Christmas to them?

I miss the good old days.
When Christmas was Christmas!
Eh! Sikukuu.

my female pains..

BEAUTIFULLY BROKEN.

I tend to think I'm the sperm that won,
But sometimes I'm just the ovum that lost.
I wish I was one in a million, 
But in a million none could choose me.

I wish you could see my beauty beyond my scars,
Or the smile behind my braces,
Sometimes it hurts so much,
I can't even tell it's paining,
Sometimes I cry so much,
I don't realise it's raining,
Because I am a woman.
I bear it all.

I give big smiles at work,
Just to go home to a battering husband,
I feel so alone,
I loose myself,
I give up everything to you, to the world, and end up a beggar.
I get lost, confused,
When there's a big contrast from that rush of the first kiss,
And the agony and sharp pain of the first slap.

How did we get here?
How did I lose you?
When I tell you I love you,
You say you'll find some time to do,
When I say I need you,
You mockingly laugh it off..
You used to be a saint,
More of like everything at the same exact time.
I try to be that woman, that girl,
I wish you could see.

There's more to me than makeup can ever conceal,
Just one word can fix it all,
One gesture can make me whole again.

The razor cuts don't help anymore,
And as I hold this gun to my head,
I remember everything,
Beautifully broken.

freedom right..

LIBERTY CHANT.

If only we could learn not to hide but flaunt our light,
To let it light up the world,
So many times we resent our own with the desire to be like another, 
Just why do you want to Be a copy, a sample when you are the original?
If we could let our inside free,
Let our brightness be,
Because most of the times the little we think we are, is the more we seem to be.

Don't be too shy to believe in yourself,
Or too naive to let others put you down,
It doesn't matter how broken and hurt you are,
Smile because one day you'll get past it.

Freedom is not actually walking unbound,
Freedom is letting the being in you become you.
Yes, you are smart, beautiful intelligent,
Lift the veil and let the whole world see,
Let it shine so bright, relish in the moment,
Because there can only be one only you,
They say you can only live once,
But what is life without a purpose?
Life without a cause?

Live a life you are willing to die for,
Every smile counts,
Don't be too focused on others,
Till you forget the hero within.
The first step is to always trust and hope,
Live the moment and have it for life.

secret stares..

SECRET ADMIRER.

I stand here all day,
Against this pretty pink wall with patches of white,
I watch you as you sleep, 
So perfect, angelic!
I've shared and experienced in all your emotions,
From how excited you were when you got the promotion,
To the terrible break down when you caught him cheating.

I love how you stare at Me, mostly in the mornings,
You always were walk in worried
I always assure you that you truly are beautiful,
I make your day just as you make mine,
Your burning eyes explore me
With some wild desire threatening to tear me apart,
I wish we could speak,
Though we do it, it's pretty much a monologue.

I watch as you wake up every Morning,
The gorgeous smile follows as you move closer,
After the bathroom too close,
I glare at your beautiful naked body,
Sometimes you kiss me,
Sometimes you don't,
What makes me happy is that you're back and faithful to me,
just hoping that someday
When I become just a broken mirror in the trash,
And not on this beautiful wall,
You will still love me.

Because it's true,
You look good even in a broken mirror.

Guilty pleasures,,

CANDY DADDY.

They say life moves too fast,
I replied; for the weak and meek,
Well I take mine at my own pace,
It's more like poker,
He dangles the candy,
And I play the dummy.

You see life ain't fair,
Never was, never will be,
A bastard I am, not that I really care,
But now I dine and wine with the mighty.

I have a thing for big stuff,
Big cars, houses and of course my BIG DADDY.
Y'all know there's more To candy than just taste,
More to money than just haste.
Call me love, call me babe, call me whore.

So what if I miss my classes and some periods too?
He's my candy daddy,
I have it all,
At his Beck and call,
Spoils me with his Money,
And I spoil him with my cookie.

My candy daddy,
Dangles the candy,
And I really don't care.